1436 Days

I stared at the pages in front of me and with the grandest of intentions I wrote:

1. that the girls call me Lera

It was December of 2011.  The fog of the past 3 months had slowly started to lift, though I wasn't sure my soul would ever recover.  During this time I heard about a blogger, Ann Voskamp, who was encouraging people to write down 1000 things for which they were thankful.  

I thought it would take me a year... 

1,436 days later I wrote: 1000.  1000 gifts

4 years.  4 years of rewriting my soul.  As I get older I am beginning to realize that deep long lasting change often happens with slow consistency. 

"Thanksgiving must be wrought into the life as a habit—before it can become a fixed and permanent quality. An occasional burst of praise, in the midst of years of complaining, is not what is required. Songs on rare, sunshiny days; and no songs when skies are cloudy—will not make a life of gratitude. The heart must learn to sing always. This lesson is learned only when it becomes a habit which nothing can weaken. We must persist in being thankful. When we can see no reason for praise—we must believe in the divine love and goodness, and sing in the darkness."
J.R. Miller, 1912 

This quote by J.R. Miller is on the first page of my journal.  Many days I have struggled to find something to write down.  Each time I am struggling inevitably I flip back to that first page and read this quote over and over allowing the words to seep into my soul.  Discovering that there is power in writing and in reading. 

"We have a natural tendency to remember what we should forget and forget what we should remember."
Mark Batterson

The rewriting of my soul is not over yet.  My heart is still learning to sing.  Each time my pen touches the paper thanksgiving is being etched into my soul.  So what does one do when they have reached 1000 gifts?

1001. ....

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